How can I buy diapers with out getting caught? :/

Hi all. I havent been on the forum in awhile. I have a serious question to ask and I'm hoping you all would help me out. Right now I am 24 years old. "Recently turned 24" And I'm a guy. I still live at home with my parents and if I did this and get caught my life would probably be over. Literally. Im even scared of asking this question right now. I really have an urge to wear diapers. I cant take it anymore. I even fantasise about wearing them. I want to buy some but Im afraid I would be found out by parents or brothers. I live in a trailer so our house aint that big and I have no placs to hide and keep em stashed. The only way for me to get diapers is I would move out which I dont want to atm. Hard to find a place. How can I buy diapers with out getting caught? And Im trying to get the right diaper size and cant find it. I wear size L or M underpants if that helps. What are good diaper brands too? I know theres Nappies, Goodnites, Huggies etc. Its gonna be really risky. And Im afraid of doing this. And is there a diaper size chart for abdl that can help you compair sizes? I dont know how to measure. How can I get diapers and hide them with out getting caught? Sorry for long post. Highly nervous as it is. :( If anyone can help me or give me tips I'd appreciate it. And if you buy diapers on Amazon can the mailman/UPS know what they are? Thanks! And if I plan to wear them in public. How can I hide them from friends or family with out finding out? Thank you. And is it reccomended buying baby powerder as well? Can you buy it from Amazon etc? Thanks.

How can I buy diapers with out getting caught? :/