Hello everyone! I did a search on this topic, although I didn't really see any relevant threads discussing what I'm talking about.
So I'm a part of DDLG and as a result, I am heavily into the caregiver side of a relationship. I'm a daddy dom and I love taking care of my girlfriend as a Little. I find it incredibly rewarding, cute, and even romantic. That being said, I also despise kids.
Okay, I guess I don't "hate" kids, but I hate the thought of actually having my own. I know it's ironic, since I love being a "daddy", but whenever I think about having my own children, I feel repulsed. There are a number of reasons— they're messy, they're loud, they're EXPENSIVE, they're time consuming, they're stressful, they take away time from my loved one, they need constant attention, they need to be taught quite literally everything, etc. etc. etc. I could go on. Bottom line— I don't want kids of my own. Ever.
Now I have no problem with people who want they're own kids. I'm not going to be disgusted by parents or wannabe-parents. I'm not going to think less of people who want kids or lecture people why having kids is not worth the trouble. I don't care what people want to do with their reproductive abilities or desire for future family. Yet, everyone seems concerned with MINE.
I constantly get asked when I'm having kids/how many kids I want/if I'm excited to start my own family. I always answer calmly and politely, "Oh, I don't want to have kids. They're not for me." And of course, I'm frequently meant with a surprised look as if I just tried to proclaim myself as God, or something. Then comes "the storm."
"WHY don't you want kids? Who wouldn't want kids? Don't you want a family? What if your wife wants them??"
I really shouldn't have to explain myself. "Because I don't want them" should be a good enough answer, but it never seems to be. I explain myself, and then I get round 2:
"You'll change your mind when you're older! *hearty laugh*" "Everyone wants kids once they turn *insert age here*!" "You'll fall in love and then you'll get baby fever!"
No, I won't change my mind. In fact, as I got older, I changed my mind from 'wanting kids' to 'NOT wanting kids'. I'm 21, which is still young, sure. But this is something I absolutely know about myself. I used to always think that having kids was a requirement. I felt pressured into having them, so I told myself I did want them. As I got older, I realized "Hey, it's my life. I'm under no obligation to reproduce." I'd rather focus on myself, my loved one, and my career solely. If you want to add kids to that equation, great! For me, no thank you.
Then of course, there's the 3rd round:
"How could you be so selfish? I can't believe you don't want to have kids. What else is there to do in life? YOU WERE A CHILD ONCE TOO!11!"
At this point, I just end the conversation, though it shouldn't get to this to begin with.
I don't understand why people are so personally offended when I say I don't want kids. I don't insult kids, I don't tell them that having kids is a bad decision. I mind my own business and respect others' decisions. Yet, no one can seem to do the same for me.
Am I alone on this? Am I really that strange and perplexing? Is not wanting kids REALLY that taboo? I'm constantly met with hostility and people commonly resort to offending ME just because they don't agree with my life choice. Which, by the way, affects them in no way whatsoever.
I guess this was more of a rant than anything. I'm just wondering what are others' thoughts on this? Are there any childfree people here too? Are you met with hostility? If you're not childfree, do you find it "weird" that people don't want kids? Why such the big deal?
Thank for reading, if you made it this far!
Childfree- Why so taboo?
So I'm a part of DDLG and as a result, I am heavily into the caregiver side of a relationship. I'm a daddy dom and I love taking care of my girlfriend as a Little. I find it incredibly rewarding, cute, and even romantic. That being said, I also despise kids.
Okay, I guess I don't "hate" kids, but I hate the thought of actually having my own. I know it's ironic, since I love being a "daddy", but whenever I think about having my own children, I feel repulsed. There are a number of reasons— they're messy, they're loud, they're EXPENSIVE, they're time consuming, they're stressful, they take away time from my loved one, they need constant attention, they need to be taught quite literally everything, etc. etc. etc. I could go on. Bottom line— I don't want kids of my own. Ever.
Now I have no problem with people who want they're own kids. I'm not going to be disgusted by parents or wannabe-parents. I'm not going to think less of people who want kids or lecture people why having kids is not worth the trouble. I don't care what people want to do with their reproductive abilities or desire for future family. Yet, everyone seems concerned with MINE.
I constantly get asked when I'm having kids/how many kids I want/if I'm excited to start my own family. I always answer calmly and politely, "Oh, I don't want to have kids. They're not for me." And of course, I'm frequently meant with a surprised look as if I just tried to proclaim myself as God, or something. Then comes "the storm."
"WHY don't you want kids? Who wouldn't want kids? Don't you want a family? What if your wife wants them??"
I really shouldn't have to explain myself. "Because I don't want them" should be a good enough answer, but it never seems to be. I explain myself, and then I get round 2:
"You'll change your mind when you're older! *hearty laugh*" "Everyone wants kids once they turn *insert age here*!" "You'll fall in love and then you'll get baby fever!"
No, I won't change my mind. In fact, as I got older, I changed my mind from 'wanting kids' to 'NOT wanting kids'. I'm 21, which is still young, sure. But this is something I absolutely know about myself. I used to always think that having kids was a requirement. I felt pressured into having them, so I told myself I did want them. As I got older, I realized "Hey, it's my life. I'm under no obligation to reproduce." I'd rather focus on myself, my loved one, and my career solely. If you want to add kids to that equation, great! For me, no thank you.
Then of course, there's the 3rd round:
"How could you be so selfish? I can't believe you don't want to have kids. What else is there to do in life? YOU WERE A CHILD ONCE TOO!11!"
At this point, I just end the conversation, though it shouldn't get to this to begin with.
I don't understand why people are so personally offended when I say I don't want kids. I don't insult kids, I don't tell them that having kids is a bad decision. I mind my own business and respect others' decisions. Yet, no one can seem to do the same for me.
Am I alone on this? Am I really that strange and perplexing? Is not wanting kids REALLY that taboo? I'm constantly met with hostility and people commonly resort to offending ME just because they don't agree with my life choice. Which, by the way, affects them in no way whatsoever.
I guess this was more of a rant than anything. I'm just wondering what are others' thoughts on this? Are there any childfree people here too? Are you met with hostility? If you're not childfree, do you find it "weird" that people don't want kids? Why such the big deal?
Thank for reading, if you made it this far!
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